Do what’s best for your children’s marriage
By Elina-Ombili Shishaki (Youth Matters)
Getting married is one of the great decisions one can ever make in life. Marriage symbolises love and permanent attraction between two people.
So that the wedding day and everything around it is supposed to be an occasion determined and arranged by the two people making this permanent commitment to love each other in good days and in bad days.
But one of the biggest challenges faced by soon-to-wed couples is when parents take over their children’s wedding arrangements. But when things get out of hand they put blame on their children.
The parents may come up with a list of suggestions on what needs to be done without consideration of their child’s financial status; (for instance some parents may want more clothing for relatives, friends, and others, best catering services, etc.) when their plans are backfired, more questions arise in their minds: “What will people say? Will I ever be able to face them?”
Yes, relatives and far away family members might have supported you in the past but it’s not the best thing to repay for one’s favour by making your child’s wedding a feast for all.
This may drive your child to get loans or even go to the extent of stealing just for the sake of fulfilling their parent’s wishes.
After the wedding only the child suffers from the debt burden. If marriage is for happiness, will happiness come where there is debt to worry about and credit to pay? Will they ever find happiness they deserve in a house with financial difficulties?
Many newlyweds got depressed and some even ended up losing their precious lives because of such acts of trying to impress the community on the day of your child’s wedding.
Marriages will be a success only if parents hold hands in supporting their children in better planning their event without exceeding their budget. Parents should play a crucial role in good decision-making rather than doing so just to impress the society.
It will be in their best interest if the couple would have pre-wedding meetings with close relatives from both families to discuss and resolve all their differences. Parents should not undermine their children’s plans.
As parents you will always be expected to take the bull by the horns and help your children in any way possible without creating any misunderstandings on the day of their weddings.
Parents are supposed to nurture their children when it comes to taking big steps as this.
Let’s support our children in any way possible and do what is best for them to save their marriage from falling apart.